I am a teacher.

That word comes with lots of baggage. The word teacher makes some people all warm and fuzzy while throwing others into PTSD flashbacks.  Add to that the fact that I am a  French teacher, and it garners some interesting reactions.

Actually, there are really only two major responses to the revelation that I am a French Teacher.

Typical Introductory Conversation Type 1

Me: Hi! My name is Abby!

*shake hands*

Person A: Hi Abby, I’m Person A! So, Abby, what do you do?

Me: Oh, I teach high school French!

Person A: *awkward pause* Oh. I took Spanish.*

*please note: this is interchangeable with “Oh. I failed French.” or “Oh, then I guess we have nothing in common.”

Typical Introductory Conversation Type 2

Me: Hi! My name is Abby!

*shake hands*

Person B: Hi Abby, I’m Person B! So, Abby, what do you do?

Me: Oh, I teach high school French!

Person B: Oh really? *sketchy french laugh* Voulez-vous couchez avec moi*??

*please note: this is interchangeable with literally ANY french phrase that Person B has ever heard before and retained. Examples include (but are not limited to) “Parlez-vous français?” and “Où est la bibliothèque?”

Do you see what happened there?

Really, Either situation leaves the Abby in the situation in a little bit of an awkward social position, don’t you think? It’s like Person A thinks we no longer have any common ground because of my language affinity, while Person B is trying to force common ground by spouting random words (and occasionally unintentionally soliciting). Maybe I should just make up a new job title? Hmmm.

Romance Language Coach plays into too much innuendo.

Francey-Pants Extraordinaire doesn’t sound like a real job. Neither does  Paid Language Nerd, for that matter.

Francophone Guide is too pretentious.

Language Spreading Plague-Rat is just too menacing.

I’m drawing a blank. Any other ideas?

Whatever my job title may be, the reality has already garnered some interesting mottos. One of my students recently made my day by saying “French Class; Where People Find Happiness”. That’s my favorite.

There are, however, other (less savory) options that arise just as organically. One immediate example comes to mind. Sometimes, to try to make vocabulary more interesting, I post videos for my students on YouTube.com. One time, I decided to be particularly helpful/entertaining and I assembled this video:

There I am, trying to make things more engaging for my students, right? And some other French teacher must’ve decided to use it as a resource, because months after we’ve finished talking about it in my class, I got an e-mail notification from YouTube.

That’s me.

Abby, French Teacher

Making the School Day Harder, One Lesson at a Time.