Real Life: Unprepared

Recently, I have come face to face with a few things I am not prepared to deal with; situations that have left me agog and without any sort of real response. Completely nonplussed.

1.) My Roommate, asking for advice on how to deal with getting arrested.Screen Shot 2013-09-10 at 6.17.47 PM

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What was she arrested for, might you ask? Oh, you know, just having a fist fight out front in the middle of the night. A drunken fist fight that resulted in all sorts of broken mess. So, who did she ask for advice regarding how to proceed? Oh, you know, just me. Sorry, but I don’t have any experience in this field.

2.) My Roommate’s gentleman caller (and I use the term gentleman loosely) and his choice of apparel.

Molly? Really?

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What exactly should my response BE, when someone walks into my house wearing this t-shirt?

3.) Waking up to cop cars outside my home TWICE in one month.

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That’s right, TWICE. Not only did that first incident occur, but I got a nice little phone call at 6:30am this weekend after Molly’s BFF broke into my neighbor’s house by accident (?!)/ whilst high as a kite. Is this something I should’ve been prepared for? Something normal I should be equipped to deal with? Because I am woefully unprepared.

Does this mean I need to develop a whole new skill set? 

My Real Life: Living With Roommates

roommatesI have lived with 17 different people since leaving for college back in 2004. 17 is a large number. In my years as what-feels-like a professional roommate, I have learned a lot. I have met some lovely people and some not-so-lovely people. I’ve had some wonderful experiences and some unexpected experiences. I’ve done some growing up. . . some. I might even have begun to understood what is important when living with people. But if nothing else, having roommates cycle through my life has provided me with moments of sheer ridiculousness. I have decided to share them, in all their limited artistic glory, just because they happened. To me. Which is pretty darn wild. SO, with a complete lack of chronological order, it begins.

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